I’m
trying to “enjoy the journey” as they say but it’s been harder than usual
lately. I’m not completely sure why but I think some of the factors may be how
I grew up. I grew up always overweight and not active. Spending all that time
in that state just wore on me. Sure, there were many times I would try to eat
better and exercise, trying various ways of either going on a specific diet
that may or not include starving myself but nothing ever really changed for the
long-term.
As the
years went by I got heavier and heavier and more and more sedentary. Food was a
crutch for me. It’s where I went for emotional support. Of course it’s only an instant
gratification thing but it did the trick for a few minutes. Soon afterwards I
would go back to feeling the feeling that lead me to eating in the first place.
What a vicious cycle!
Do I
have it all figured out now that I’ve lost 115 lbs and taken up running? Nope.
But I think I go about becoming a healthier person in a better, safer way now.
I think my new issue is that for once in my life I’m actually not too far from
my goal weight. It’s like I can almost touch it and know I can reach it which
makes me want it yesterday even more. Even more than just the losing weight is
the running. I want to be a marathon runner yesterday too.
Why can’t
I just be happy with the process?
I don’t
know why. I need to start working on that.
The
other question I need to ask myself is what will happen once I reach that goal
weight? Will there be fireworks and balloons? Will the world stop spinning and
everyone will sing me a song? Nope. That’s not going to happen but of course it
will be nice to meet that goal. My point is, will I just stop eating better and
taking care of myself once I hit that goal? I don’t think so. I just need work
on enjoying everything I can do now that I couldn’t do before. I need to run
for me and run for the people who can’t. I need to remember how far I’ve come
in a short amount of time and continue to be the person I want and strive to
be.
You are doing great! Keep up the great work, life is full of goals!
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